“She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."
Verse 12 continues by showing us how she continually seeks to find ways to benefit him and his vision, not just when it suits her or when it coincides with what she wants. This is not the kind of woman who spends all her time at the mall, or watching talk shows, or the kind who is constantly looking for “Me Time”. In fact, I challenge you to read the chapter and see just how many times we see her doing anything for herself. We see her serving her husband, her children, her household staff, her community. What we don’t see is her heading off to get a manicure or seeing a movie with her friends, or taking classes, or going to the gym, or any of the other things our culture tells us we need to be a good mom. Now before you start sending me emails about how you are free to do those things, etc… Let me say this. None of these things are a sin. What is a sin is when you let activities like these get in the way of your mission which is serving and caring for your family. Any activity can be a sin if you let it step between you and your calling; sewing, crocheting, reading, the list goes on and on. I just picked a few of my favorite things. Just because it is domestic, doesn’t mean you can do it whenever you feel like it. If I am crocheting when I should be making dinner for my family, it is sin. I am setting something up in a place of importance that should be taking a lower place at that moment. I am making a substitution of what can be a good thing for what is the best thing. The point is we all need to make sure we have our focus on God’s plan and God’s way of doing things. And we also need to remember that we are here to help and compliment our husbands in their life’s work. We can’t do that to the best of our ability if we are seeking our own goals, pleasure or comfort in what we do.
Another very important point is that she seeks his good not just when they are married but all the days of her life. And as our pastor loves to say, in Hebrew, all means all. That means before they are married, she is already seeking ways to bless him. Maybe this is just as simple as studying how to run a home, or how to train children in a Godly way. It may be learning to serve your father, and what better practice is there for your future! This is a very important part of training our daughters. They need to know how much value God places on faithfulness, not just in marriage but all our live and in all aspects. We must teach them to do what is right at all times, even when single. I personally spent quite a few years single. And even in all that time, I still find things that I wish I would have taken the time to learn. I wish I would have learned to quilt and knit and read up on how to train my children better. Teach your daughters to bless and serve their husbands now. It doesn’t get any easier as they get older. Show them by example what it looks like to be a faithful wife, whose husband safely trusts her and who seeks to do him good all her life.